Ø
Great power comes with great electricity bills.
Ø
Do you still hate me?? I don’t care!!
Ø
Life is onetime offers use it well.
Ø
Life is short smile while you still have teeth.
Ø
Follow your heart but take your brain with you.
Ø
Enjoy your life–there’s is plenty of time to be
dead.
Ø
If Monday had a face, I would punch it.
Ø
I’m too shy at first but once I’m comfortable
with you get ready for some crazy shit.
Ø
Dear Karma, I have a list of people you missed.
Ø
Stop thinking too much, it’s all right not to
know all the answers.
Ø
No one is the reason of your happiness expect
you yourself.
Ø
Silent people have the craziest minds.
Ø
Marriage means silent suicide.
Ø
I fell in love at first sight. I should have
looked twice.
Ø
All my life a thought air was free…Until I
bought a bag of chips.
Ø
People said to follow your dreams so i went back
to bed.
Ø
3 AM my cell is ringing…hey there you
asleep?? No I’m Skydiving.
Ø
I am a ninja, no, you are not. Did you see me do
that? Do what? “Exactly”.
Ø
I like when you smile, but I love it when I’m
the reason.
Ø
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
Ø
You have the perfect face for radio.
Ø
Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.
Ø
Well I could agree with you, but then we’d both
be wrong.
Ø
You look like a before picture.
Ø
I was pro life before I met you.
Ø
I don’t get drunk, i get awesome.
Ø
I will marry the girl, who look pretty in her
Adhaar card.
Ø
A man asks a trainer in the gym: “I want 2
impress that beautiful girl , which machine can I use?” Trainer replies: “Use
the ATM”
Ø
People say everything happens for a reason. So
when I punch you in the face, remember I have a reason. ??
Ø
Open Books, Not Legs. Blow Minds, Not Guy
Ø
God is really creative , i mean ..just look at
me ??
Ø
My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3
hours.
Ø
The only reason god made cousins so that parents
can compare our marks.
Ø
People say laughter is the best medicine. Your
face must be curing the world.
Ø
When life gets tough, remember: You were the
strongest sperm.
Ø
The difference between pizza and your opinion is
that I asked for pizza.
Ø
I Have Good News And Bad News To Tell You. The
Bad News? I Have No Good News. And The Good News? I Have No Bad News.
Ø
I don’t always lose my phone but when I do its
always on silent.
Ø
I really need a day in between Saturday and
Sunday.
Ø
Anyone else sit on the toilet and play with
their phone until you realized you have been finished 10 minutes ago?
Ø
Justin Bieber was arrested this morning for
using men’s toilet.
Ø
Love Funny Whatsapp Status, Quotes In Hindi
Language
Ø
Money can’t buy happiness, but it pays for
internet, which is pretty much the same thing.
Ø
You Don’t Know Something? Google It. You Don’t
Know Someone? Facebook It. You Can’t Find Something? Mom!
Ø
Can I take your picture?? I love to collect
pictures of natural disasters.
Ø
Someone on his status “Sleeping” …since 3 Days!
He’s Probably dead. ?
Ø
Just saw the most smartest person when i was in
front of the mirror ??
Ø
I hate when I am about to hug someone really
sexy and my face hits the mirror.
Ø
Those who say money can’t buy happiness are
shopping at the wrong places.
Ø
Oooooh, thats a bit too harsh. Let me put a
`lol` at the end of it.
Ø
Dear iPhone, Please stop changing my rude words
into nice ones. You piece of shut.
Ø
I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge.
Ø
Marriage is a relationship in which one person
is always right and the other is the husband!
Ø
I’m not single, I’m just romantically
challenged.
Ø
They say “don’t drink and drive”. Well….
yesterday I was drinking a juice box while riding my tricycle. Yeah. I’m a
badass.
Ø
Our language is called the mother tongue because
the father never gets a chance to Speak.
Ø
When your ex asks if you can still be friends
right after a break up, it’s like having a kidnapper tell you to keep in touch.
Ø
Taking revenge is wrong…very very wrong.. But
very very fun.
Ø
The funniest thing in class is when the teacher
cracks a joke and no one laughs.
Ø
The annoying moment when the TV commercials are
so long that you forget what you’re watching.
Ø
Even if you are a mass murderer, International
rogue,and children Abductor,People Will Still bless you “continue to be who you
are” in your birthday.
Ø
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my
grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
Ø
You’re Just Jealous Because The Voices Are
Talking To Me
Ø
Looks like I over-estimated the number of your
brain cells.
Ø
Remember, there are two words in life that will
open a lot of doors for you. Push and Pull.
Ø
If you love something, let it go. If it comes
back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down & kill it.
Ø
Why do parents get so upset about little things
like goddamn I left a plate in the sink not a dead body.
Ø
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but
this wasn’t it.
Ø
With all this technology above and under,
humanity still hunts down one another.
Ø
If Relationship between man and women were
shoes, I’d wear you out. But I wouldn’t wear you out in public.
Ø
I am currently experiencing life at the rate of 15
WTF’s every hours.
Ø
Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi
connection.
Ø
Most of the fruits I know now and did not know
were existed – Is only because of the shampoo
Ø
I saw a shampoo with the title: “Rich-looking”
So I washed my purse ..
Ø
Takleef to zindagi deti hai maut ko to log yuhi
badnaam karte hai!!
Ø
tum kisi or se LOVE kar lo hame sudharne mai
Time lagega… ??
Ø
per mai moch and slow internet connection aadmi
ko kbhi aage badne nahi dete.
Ø
aql badam khane se nahi thokar khane se aati
hai.
Ø
Yaaro Ki Mehfil Aise Jamai Jati Hai, Kholne Se
Pehle Botal Hilai Jati Hai.
Ø
Hamne chor diya shoq-a-mohabat ka…varna tere
shar ki khidkiyan to aaj bhi isare karti hai.
Ø
Sher mai hu mai tere..aake mujhe dhek to le.
Ø
ye sala pyar ho gya ki UPSC ka exam ho gya pass
hi ho rha.
Ø
Meri zindagi chal toh rahi thi … par tere aane
se maine jeena shuru kar diya.
Ø
mai apna chehra bhul skta hu but tumhara nahi.
Ø
roti ussi ko milni chahiye jise uski bhook ho.
Ø
Aksar chirag wohi bhujate hai … jo pehle usse
rosan karte hai.
Ø
Babuji Exam se dar nahi lagta..slow internet se
lagta hai.
Ø
4 Botal vodak, kam mera roj ka.
Ø
Fiqr kar uski jo teri fiqr kre, u to zindgi mai
bhut hai hamdard.
Ø
Main marne ke liye nahi peeta … peene ke liye
marta hun.
Ø
Bimaar ke saath koi bimaar nahi ho jaata hai
Ø
Salo lag jate pyar wale jkham bharne mai.
Ø
Sun rha hai na tu ro rha hu main.